In The Wink Of A Young Girl's Eye

We all have our little stories, don't we? Those tales of past triumphs and tragedies that we occasionally share with our loved ones, even if they have heard these stories far too many times and no longer bother paying attention to the words that dribble out of your fat face every Thanksgiving as that endless parade unfolds on the flat-screen television before your eyes.

 The soulless, beady eyes of Snoopy seem to stare into your very soul as you tell this pointless story for the 1,000th time to a group of food-drunk family members who couldn't give less of a shit about whatever you have to say at this point in the afternoon. But the story just keeps bubbling up through the fracture that is your mouth, and it's taken on a life of its own at this point. It will not be stopped or bargained with. The story will be told.

There's nothing more pathetic than being that guy who dwells forever in the golden days of his past glories, often at the cost of accomplishing anything in the present. Like Al Bundy, I suppose, or the subject of that Bruce Springsteen song "Glory Days". Four touchdowns in one game, indeed. The following podcast is a little like that.

Yes, it's that time again, time to unveil a brand-new episode of that podcast so ugly even its own mother tried to drown it in the creek, Big Jim's Bobcat Buffet. In this delightful installment, the 52nd if you can believe it, our favorite guests Titus & Laura return once again to have a discussion about the past. My past, in particular. Although it wasn't planned this way, the conversation turned toward some of my meager past accomplishments, and I was asked to elaborate for the sake of Laura, who hadn't heard these boring stories before, so I reluctantly obliged.

I don't generally enjoy telling stories like these, believe it or not, because they tend to make me uncomfortable, but sometimes these things just happen. The only one of these stories I've ever actually liked sharing was the epic story of my brief time as a successful independent comic book publisher at the tender age of ten, but none of my current friends really seem to believe that one, even though it's completely true. I always just thought it was an interesting tale, but I may be mistaken.

Back on point, here's the new episode. Listen and learn:

Chapter 52: The Man From Chicago



That's all I've got for you people today. You've got your pound of flesh, now leave me in peace.

TIME MARCHES ON! 

Sofia Vergara Approved!